Tag: #careerchange

Leave or Lean in? My Year In Review

Published October 12, 2021 by V

Well, it’s been nearly a year and before crossing the chasm into my future I wanna review what’s worked, hasn’t, and what direction to take this in.

I encourage everyone reading this to do the same.

So, for this last year I’ve developed myself as a writer, started muay thai training, posted on this blog daily, and I’ve learned more about myself… again.

The latter might be most significant, though corny– crucial. Unlike what we’re constantly fed about goal-setting and self improvement, I no longer create goals based off my strengths.

Desires? Kinda sorta.

In truth, everything in my life is an insurance policy built around my weaknesses. Especially my goals.

Knowing myself, I always want to leave. I’ve always craved escape but the massive improvement is that even with that– I’ve stayed the course. Nothing happens from bouncing, it just creates the need for more of it.

Since I know my mind does this little thing where as soon as I get bored of my reality I want to burn down all progress, find a new path, and backpack across it–

I don’t.

I stopped acting on that impulse, because that’s all it is. A biological knee-jerk reaction to dissatisfaction.

Note to self: for this next year, I want you to go all out. Like you did that one year, your best year– you know the one.

Let’s just see what happens if you take the things you have before you, and you magnify them by fully embracing them.

A year is nothing in the grand scheme of things.

If you aren’t sure what to do, what you want, or where to go– LEAN IN first. More comes from this than leaving.

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Storm Drains: How To Use Bruce Lee’s “Empty Mind”

Published October 11, 2021 by V

A lot of successful people sell the idea of “actualization” as something you can walk right into.

You’re likely familiar with their notion– imagine who you want to be, then act like it.

As your experimenting representative, of course I’ve already tried this method and want to share with you what I’ve found….

in short, it is total kaka.

Your ideal, perfect self, higher you, whatever you want to call it– isn’t something you walk into. Although we all have super powers of imagination– you can’t pretend your way into a new life.

BUT the law of attraction? I know.

Not saying you don’t have an ideal to reach–only that you can’t randomly masquerade as them. Because you don’t know them yet– you don’t know your potential.

So, the start of this isn’t make believe rather It’s something you communicate with.

It’s helpful to understand you are a multifaceted individual, with many different wants and needs– and sometimes those desires conflict.

So instead of imagining a bullshit higher self that you keep pretending to be– and fail to be, get to know the citizens of your city, because they are very real, and they’re with you every step of the way.

Your mind is comprised of all these citizens, all have wants and needs and dreams– the key is to find the north star. The one unifying belief they all share– the one goal they all need and agree on.

This resolves all conflict, and will move you forward.

I tried to be a person who doesn’t have internal storms– who isn’t moody. Because that was my ideal, but pretending only made the storms even worse. So not only do I despise advice of “aim for your ideal” but I stand against it because it doesn’t work.

The key here is leverage.

I can direct those storms, I can ride them and make something of them.

You have to find your Storm Drains– a place to channel your energies.

I’m learning to write every single time I go through it, this way I can empty my mind and create something from the chaos.

This is the key to actualization– it is using everything you have and are, because you have it for a reason.

Quit fighting it, channel it– direct it.

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Kids see ghosts

Published October 10, 2021 by V

Since my Daycare-dwelling-days, I always believed there was something more to life– not just here, but onward and afterwards.

No one convinced me, my parents weren’t religious, and I never talked about it. It was just something I held with me.

But like most of us, as I adulted– I started to lose the magic.

This isn’t a spiritual post, or me talking about some bad ouiji board experience– that’d be cool, but I know better than to ever touch one of those things.

This post is about my grip on reality and yours…

And how we don’t see clearly at all.

The thing that I’m afraid of now is myself.

When I’m clearheaded– it’s so easy to build. All my obstacles disappear and I can focus on what’s in front of me. I mean, damn– I’m a writer, I work remote, I’m finally building towards something and as far as options go– for the first time I have a lot of them.

But this thinking doesn’t last.

I don’t think I’m even close to skilled enough to explain the what, why, and how of my inner saboteur, but I can try.

It always happens, and fast.

I get restless, my mind plays comparison games, and I start to see everything in a negative light: Where I am, who I am, and all the people in my life.

An urge to always start over takes over, and in that moment, It’s like everything in my life becomes something I stand against.

This is why it took me so long to see any kind of success. I was never able to see real life, and that’s why I couldn’t get better of it.

I see ghosts.

Your problems weren’t real, kid.

When I finally realized that, I was able to take control back by relying on systems and now I’m taking it a step further– systems of thought.

You’ll know when you attack your real demons, because the byproduct is progress. You’ll finally break free of the loop you’re stuck in.

It’s funny most of us don’t believe in ghosts– but how much of what you see actually happened?

If you want to break free and gain a new life, you need to get as close to reality as possible. That starts with you realizing you daydream…

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Everyone’s a Gemini: Your Problem with Your Twin…

Published October 9, 2021 by V

How often do you talk to your twin?

I know, most of us don’t get along with family.

But you have to make peace with this one, because they’re conjoined with you at the brain– we’re talking about your twin. There’s the public YOU and the private YOU.

And even though twinzo’s private, they narrate every part of our stories.

So let’s talk about self-acceptance.

“Love thyself, accept your weirdness, your quirks make you who you are”– a lot of sweet nothings shoved down our brains in an attempt to convince us that theres nothing wrong with us.

meh.

As if settling automatically makes you love yourself.

See, your narrator won’t fall for what the public does, because unlike the public, they know everything about you, and they know when you lie.

I’m starting to see internal conflict as data, nothing personal, emotional, or negative. Where there is conflict, there is a need for resolution– and so, we should embrace all internal conflict.

It’s often subtle, and very hard to distinguish.

But you’ll know when there’s a problem with your twin.

For example– let’s say you’re doing everything you’re supposed to be doing. You have a career that’s solid, you’ve got hobbies you’re enjoying, and you’re steadily building your own project on the side.

Everything looks good– except, only you know, you’re miserable. Deep down, pissed off.

Instead of addressing it, you ignore it– because the realization that others who work harder than you have less fills you with massive guilt.

This creates a depressive spiral. And on-and-on it goes.

What creates this dissatisfaction?

And an even better question– who’s unhappy? You or your twin?

Sometimes you don’t want the same thing, and sometimes you do– it’s important to play for the same team if you’re going to get ahead.

Build a relationship with them.

My twin wants mastery, total submission to a skill, to be consumed by his own desire and direct that towards a singular purpose.

Me– I just want money and fame.

We clash over this every time. I just want to live a fun life, play, do cool shit– but twinster is intense, and needs much more.

Two people can’t drive one car, but they can agree on the destination.

Well, that’s what’s happening.

For the sake of keeping both parties happy, I’ve let go of some of my empty delusions to better my relationship with my twin.

I need him, and so, we’re working together.

Muay thai is for my twin. Writing is for my twin. When I’m alone and working– that’s for him. Because he has the intensity to focus.

When the time comes to step out and play– It’ll be me at the forefront.

Like it or not, we all have a twin.

So choose what you do wisely.

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Tightly Wound Up

Published October 8, 2021 by V

If you’re one of those self improvement junkies, this’ll help you ease off the gas– what you’re doing is ultimately pointless.

Sure.

It might help, by a fraction of a fraction, to intermittent fast, cold shower, and meditate floating 3 inches above the ground having surrendered sugar, but understand that all of that is unnecessary if you don’t take action.

Action is the only requirement for success.

The universe plays no part in that equation, but the law of attraction is somehow still a better sell.

It’s weird how good we get at rationalizing. It’s easy to blame the wrong things in life, and then spend time trying to change them– to no avail.

Bedazzling a jewel on the center of your forehead won’t open that third eye, and those plugged up chakras can’t be helped.

There is no deserve, the affirmations aren’t needed, and you don’t have to feel good about what you’re doing. Might even be better to feel like shit– you’re a beginner, you’re supposed to feel incompetent.

We’re all looking way too into it.

You just have to act– even just a little, consistently, and then you’ll find yourself go from nothing to something.

Action makes us, not the other way around.

It’s weird realizing this, especially when you look around and see most people avoiding action– perpetually stuck in a state of getting ready to act.

Those that keep the same insane disciplines, succeed– and then repeat, they’re so tightly wound up they attribute all their success to cold showers and starvation.

Riiiiiight.

If that’s your thing have at it, but the reason some of these successful goo-roos want to live forever is because they don’t live at all.

“A well employed life brings a well employed death” -Da Vinci.

My point is this, don’t get all wound up preparing for success. Quit overthinking it.

It’s small action steps– for everything.

A better self, life, and career.

You don’t need anything else. Reading a gazillion books, buying nonstop courses, or searching for a mentor (might help but not necessary) all pointless.

Through action, we’re reborn.

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Play is not Pretend

Published October 7, 2021 by V

I don’t believe in change.

In fact, the more self-aware I’ve become the more I see the same little kid inside of me– the one who struggled with the same tendencies and played with the same fiction.

The only difference is he didn’t try to change, make-believe was something he could do without judging himself.

That’s something I miss.

I believe in adaptation.

And how you adapt is actually very simple– go where you are called to go.

Each of us is drawn to different tools. For me it’s a specific author, for you it could be a speaker, entrepreneur, goo-roo, etc.

But who/ what you are drawn to is the key to everything in your life.

See, I used to think we could pretend and that would somehow trick our brains into living that life we always dreamed of. I read so many different ideas on this– all coming to the conclusion that leveraging a white lie to change your attitude is a good thing.

In other words– if we put ourselves in a playful state, even faking it, our life would naturally become playful.

The problem with that is it’s temporary.

My play is not your play. My play is not pretend.

We come to this world pre-designed. Our genetic makeups determine what we’re drawn to and what engages us– but we still move away from this?

Then we wonder why we feel empty.

Don’t change the wrong things.

Find what is play for you, and bring it into your life– no matter how small. That’s the only change we should engage in.

Don’t try to change yourself, change the things in your life that don’t align with you.

Your only task is to bring out that person who talks to you inside.

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What are you talking about?

Published October 6, 2021 by V

What are you saying– because the tongue goes where the mind is.

Pay attention to the things you say, to who you say them, how you say them.

Because like it or not, our word is our bond.

Our words reveal who we are and what we think of ourselves– that whole judge by the actions, sure it’s true but we’re not judging yet, we’re diagnosing…

…from tongue to mind.

So, what that mouth do?

Because only when you’re going off-script is when you’re really saying something, everything else is you blowing smoke.

You’ll notice the genre you talk about is always the same.

For some, it’s relationships, others ambitions, but it works the same– we show our values each time we communicate.

Why is this important?

If you want fulfillment you have to bridge the gap.

I was always ambitious– that’s a top value for me, but it took embarrassingly long to take action.

While I’d talk a big game, I had a hard time sticking– there was inner conflict.

That doesn’t change that the value is certainly ambition, but there was a mental block I had to work out.

There’s the point.

You know what you want– you talk about it all the time.

Even if you’re not specific, you know what’s important to you. The game you are playing is matching your internal world with your external.

Do that and you’ll have everything– fulfillment, success, awesomeness.

It starts with listening to what you say, then creating it. Don’t cheat yourself– because what you want is who you are.

We’re born to our desires.

Become authentic, create.

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Same Game/Different Player

Published October 5, 2021 by V

There’s a dormant superpower in each of us, and while we may never be able to fly– this untapped potential allows us to rewrite many of the immutable laws that keep us stuck.

Let’s quickly talk about the game.

For most, it’s a 9-5. A family. Going from one thing to the next, sticking to a routine– a level of sameness.

We then find ourselves kinda floating– on autopilot, wondering why we’re unhappy.

“Familiarity breeds contempt.”

If you can’t change your world from the outside, try it from the in…

And this has been the most important realization. I can’t continue playing as this character, I need to upgrade.

I’m going to play this game different because it’s necessary. Because there is nothing that you can do, achieve, or have that suddenly makes life better.

You have to learn to love it. You have to practice life-ing. Fact is, most of us don’t know how to play this game.

We exist in it as background characters– our own movies, and we’re just going through the motions.

But passion isn’t something found– it’s brought, you have to bring it to the table. You have to bring that energy, that fire, that deep engagement.

Life is something created, but we waste time looking?

My challenge to you– try to imagine a better way to play. Whatever you come up with will be authentic and unique, because you came up with it.

What you imagine will be a reflection of what you need to bring out.

And let’s try to play as the main character.

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Re-Walked Down Memory Lane

Published October 4, 2021 by V

During our want-repreneurial phase, my best friend and I would often go to this same spot.

It was a park surrounded by ginormous mansions, where the further up you walked through it– the less it became a park and more a community.

Anyway, back in the day we’d come here and hash out our lives via shootin’ the shit. We’d talk about goals, dreams, wants and needs, and of course– present struggles.

If I’m being real, it was almost always struggles.

In the span of two years, we’ve gained nearly unrecognizable lives. So, I had the idea to go back to ol’ faithful– like reading an old journal that might embarrass you, and re-walk memory lane.

We get there and we’re immediately flooded with memories (like the childhood haircut variety)– reminders of the type of losers we were. This isn’t low self esteem talking, it’s just adolescence.

I honestly don’t understand what created that struggle and how I got stuck in that place?

If I had to make a guess– I’d say withdrawing from life led to an increasingly delusional mind.

I keep my journals, memories, and all my mistakes at the forefront of my mind. It isn’t to make me feel bad– it’s just data.

Anytime I withdraw from life and try to all-or-nothing my goals, I immediately shoot up on some depresso-espresso and become ultra delusional.

What created those shit years back then– was doing nothing.

Nothing is the worst thing you can do for yourself. I look back and laugh at the imbecile I was, we both were.

You’re not allowed to worry about goals and vision when you’re stuck. Your only job in that moment is to get to neutral.

Neutral is work. Progress. Daily movement.

It’s simple.

Life is momentum, and when we’re not moving– we drain our lives of lifeforce.

Keep your mistakes at the top of mind because then when you feel like slipping, you can stay strong and you won’t.

That’s why we all have a memory lane– it’s a benefit.

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Not Bad For The Kid Who Never Smiled

Published October 3, 2021 by V

I stopped caring about the outcome… now I’m free.

So, the thing that lifts misery is not giving a f**k.

Everything I ever did, considered, pondered, debated, and acted on– all of it was in the name of this vision I had for my life. I was Thanos-serious, even as a youngling. The irony is this vision sucked the joy from every moment—

Which explains the lameness, up until now.

I’m turning 27 soon, and ya boi is Benjamin Buttoning’ up his life. I’ve never been this fulfilled, and overall happy.

It’s not about settling– I’m after my goals, but I can honestly say how my life plays out doesn’t matter to me. The point is– I’m enjoying my movie.

I’m doing what I want to do, learning about and pursuing my interests, and pushing myself. My training is better than it’s ever been, my writing improving, and I’ve got a future I can see and build towards.

Outside of these things, I’m good. Nothing else is my business (not mine to worry about).

My life keeps getting better, because I’m getting better at playing.

If you’re reading this and your life is a booger bubble, here’s an ez-tip: Add one thing you enjoy or are genuinely curious about to your daily routine.

This will end up being that foundational habit– the one thing that kicks off everything. For me, it was muay thai.

I signed up on a whim since enough was enough, I always wanted to learn. Since then, it’s positively produced awesome outcomes in other areas.

You’re not too busy to start, starting is small.

Find the smallest step you can take towards an interest, and leap of faith it.

What have you always wanted to learn? The difference between those who piss away life and those who reach their dreams is starting. Do the smallest thing you can– start today.

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Reality Planning: An alternative to cheap dreams

Published October 2, 2021 by V

While dreams can inspire you– on their own, they are just…dreams.

The more you step away from reality and “dream” the more you’ll suffer. Any time I would think about my fantasy life– where I have everything I’ve ever wanted, and in this fiction world never deal with bullshit, I end up feeling depressed.

Unknowingly, I’m comparing my life to this unrealistic internal movie and the lack of resemblance makes me feel ungrateful for what I have.

On top of that, it creates this shitty habit where you’re always chasing a dream. And you keep creating new dreams (that you don’t really care about) to fantasize over.

These are cheap dreams (not goals, not rooted in reality, not attainable).

My minds default is to binge watch my own cheap dreams despite me knowing that fulfillment comes from WORK.

Not having 24/7 fun- having.

The spice of life isn’t experience or variety, it’s improvement.

It’s staying the course.

It’s seeing how good you can get.

And although I am often restless and sidestep passed happiness, fulfillment is something I’ve been familiarizing myself coincidentally.

Wanna live an actual awesome life? Dedicate yourself to living your life.

In our current time– there’s a lot of talk on reinvention. They say you can pick up these self-improving habits, tabula rasa yourself back to neutral and start from scratch, then emerge from your cocoon as this peak you…

But that’s not what reinvention is and that likely won’t happen.

Habits for the sake of improving are stupid. Number 1- they don’t address your specific issues, and 2– you won’t stick if you can’t make a lifestyle out of them.

Waste of time.

So, what’s reality planning?

Every goal you consider, needs to be based on where you are right now and where you can take that (your skills and personality) to maximize fulfillment.

I am restless, often struggle with commitment, and my imagination likes to take me through trips of fantasy.

These are default traits– and since they’ve f**ked up my life in the past, I know to anticipate them, plan for them, and even leverage them.

Success comes from authenticity. Authenticity comes from knowing yourself.

How can you channel imagination? This trait when acted on goals– ruins you. When leveraged through writing, makes you creative.

What you’re doing is taking a objective view of your strengths and weaknesses, and then building life around it.

I am who I am. That’s true for you too.

Pretending we can have some other persons goals doesn’t make any sense, since we’re likely very different.

That said, you can create a fulfilling life by working out your DNA and leveraging it.

Reality is more interesting than fantasy anyway, so lean in.

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Finding The Game You’re the Player For

Published October 1, 2021 by V

Like for many of us, my childhood self is embarrassing.

It wasn’t necessarily the 24/7 resting angry face, the bad attitude, or the thinking he was above everything… those were bad, but not embarrassing.

His worst trait was his inability to enjoy the present and quit taking himself so seriously.

I’ve grown a lot since then, but I still periodically slip into it.

I always wanted success– but I didn’t understand it at all. See, back then I thought success was just see something, do it, take it. I didn’t think about concepts like passion, authenticity, or value. Those were hippie words to me back then.

I’ll make this short and spare you my memory lane: We can only really succeed being authentic. If you don’t like yourself– you don’t know yourself.

You need to find those unique to you traits, and leverage them.

Too many of us try to change the wrong things, or we straight up ignore important defining traits.

My challenge to you– what makes you, you?

Start with that, use it.

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Build Beyond Boredom

Published September 30, 2021 by V

A lot of the things we look for are just ways of easing our boredom. We think the restlessness is spiritual, maybe it’s depression, and so we imagine the cure is distraction.

A trip across Country, a new role or hobby, anything– so long as it’s different.

Then when we’re bold enough and act on those impulses, we’re surprised the same feeling of discontent is still there… why?

Because the boredom never came from a need for change but your disengagement.

If I had to put a percentage of how many of these blogs are letters to myself, in hopes that I don’t f**k up my life, I’d say it’s 97%. The rest are helpful/ hopeful fortune cookies.

I say that to say, BUILD where you are! Find ways to engage more.

Boredom is a struggle only because you’re off somewhere else, instead of where you are. I like my life, but it’s missing something important– a deeply help value: Excitement.

You have to find ways to enjoy the every day process– so incorporate small steps. Do anything, it can be small, it should be small.

Just make sure it excites you, even if only a little, it’s crucial for you to cross the finish line.

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2yrs of High School… For Life

Published September 29, 2021 by V

During my junior year, I had a history teacher I really admired. He was strict, didn’t believe in multiple choice tests or group work and his class was a hard one.

Right when the school year began –most teachers assigned taking home a syllabus, he assigned a 7 page paper due that week.

The average score on his test was a 70% and that’s after 4 hours of study.

Students dropped his class like flies.

I wanted to– but my mom convinced me otherwise.

Sure enough, that one teacher and his one class changed everything for me. It was hard, took dedication– but throughout the school year I improved.

My only goal became to get an A in his class, but by learning how to learn for his assignments– success spread over to other areas.

That year I had a 4.0 GPA. Even math (a usual struggle) became easy. I felt good about myself, not because I enjoyed studying or doing all that work– but because I could trust myself to take on difficulty and work.

So naturally, when recruits from a high school/college program came looking for students– I signed up.

And so, I found myself in college for my senior year of high school.

A little different this year, having remnants of my newfound ability to learn but unchecked needs for popularity, I went all out.

Here, I played.

I was popular, had my groups, took massive risks… and rather than study– I created.

If there was any chapter throughout my entire childhood that was awesome and worth reliving– it was this one, no question. That year I was Rockstar, and not a single day felt like work.

The combination of these 2 years is how I intend to live the rest of my life.

There are things that demand dedication, and it’s medicinal to do so. For me, this is muay thai. As my junior year shows, just one area of total dedication will positively infect all other aspects of your life.

That creation period from senior year– that’s what I want from my career. I want to constantly play and innovate, come up with fun projects and build with my team.

These 2 years are all I ever needed to understand what creates fulfillment.

Now I finally do.

Total commitment to the present. Total submission to your path.

No fantasizing, no wishing for a different life.

BE here, now, and fully.

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F**k Best Self… Play as your favorite

Published September 28, 2021 by V

The other day I went for a morning hike with my sister. Usually nothing comes from those other than shooting the shit, but during the final countdown, out of nowhere she sends me peak wisdom.

A meme.

Which, while typical for her– this one had a ton of truth to it. In fact, long after the hike I couldn’t help but think about it.

In this internet-existence– we’re pounded over the head with corn-quotes like: “Be your best self.”

The problem?

Best could imply anything. It could mean an unbalanced, ultra-disciplined you. It could mean a daily cold shower regiment, never so much as eye-ing sweet foods, and sleeplessly rising before the sun– in honor of the productivity gods.

Some of us are obsessive, and when left on our own could drive ourselves mad with efficiency.

Me.

I naturally do this, but as of late have eased up off the gas.

Because my best self sucks.

My favorite self on the other hand, that’s a different story.

Let’s not forget, whatever our goals and relationships and pursuits in life– it’s all for a good life. We do what we do, and how we do it, in the hopes of living a fulfilled life. But with so many self-proclaimed and unqualified teachers– it’s easy to start picking up the wrong tools.

So, to add some clarity and as the meme eloquently put it, “grace”, think about how your favorite self shows up.

For me, it’s play, fluidity, and a go-for-it attitude.

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The Cycle of Success: Let Go, Upgrade, then Advance

Published September 26, 2021 by V

Remember when you wanted this?

Everything you have right now, this journey you are on– this used to be all of it.

Your process worked.

It took a ridiculous amount of trail and error, self-improving, starting and stopping different habits, introspecting, learning who you are, chasing the wrong goals, but all that led to the path.

If you want to make it– if you’re looking for a successful life, start where you are.

The key difference looking back that would have saved me tons of time and got me on this very same path, only sooner– is this: Build where you are, and do what you’re like.

Do you know why you don’t start?

You haven’t submitted.

It’s not about dedication or commitment, it’s about submitting to the idea that there is nothing else. That this path is the only path.

It’s about intentionally blocking out all other options and making the most of your journey.

What this looks like is– you look at what traits you have, things you do everyday, and consider both your strengths and weaknesses.

My path is me.

It’s a reflection of who I am to the core– that’s partly why I got out.

Want success?

First, submit.

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Don’t Stare At the Tsunami

Published September 25, 2021 by V

Most people are fortunate enough to NOT know how they’ll respond in moments of crisis. We all watch those movies and wonder what the hell kind of reaction is freezing?

You know those end of the world movies–

where a giant wave is about to wipe a city and some people just stand there staring at the impending doom?

It’s easy to judge in this situation, but it’s the same with our internal storms.

If you stand still the waves will swallow you, but if you ride them– you’ll rise.

There are things we can and can’t change. If your mental landscape is hurricane capitol, you’re not suddenly going to become a calm person who’s chillin and livin’ 24/7.

Ignoring the storm doesn’t make it disappear.

Leveraging it as aqua power is everything. That’s the game I’m playing– I’m constantly looking at how to take my inconveniences and make them work for me.

I talk a lot– and share a lot. So, instead of letting that go to waste, I started creating content (and shifted my career goals to suit my nature). Same thing with my need to move– muay thai.

Everything you do should have a connection to who you are.

Resisting the waves will riptide you away from shore, but surrendering to self-awareness and then swimming with the current will help you make something out of your life.

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Practicing Social Dis-comfortably

Published September 24, 2021 by V

A lot of people prescribe action as the end-all be-all to whatever symptoms of pain and discomfort they might have.

But if you’re naturally impulsive, I’d pause on that.

A skill I’ve been practicing over the course of the last year is sitting with my discomfort.

You don’t always have to act– sometimes it’s better not to. Actually, when you’re agitated and tired, you should probably just step away from whatever thing you’re deciding and SLEEP ON IT.

That’s been a game changer for me.

We could all benefit hugely if we stopped taking our feelings as facts– they’re not facts, but data. If you feel agitated, there is a reason but it’s likely not the one you’ll land on.

Restless? You could be doing more– figure out how.

Agitated? Did you sleep, cross your own values, what are you missing?

There is always a reason we feel the way we do, rather than diagnosing it as you hate your life– figure out what specifically causes that feeling.

Sometimes sitting with it is all you need to address it.

I’ve always struggled with all or nothing thinking– if I felt a certain way, it meant my life was that way.

But that’s crap.

Life is actually pretty simple.

Define what’s important, and figure out how to start adding that into your day to day.

#Smallsteps

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Your World is a Mirror

Published September 23, 2021 by V

The genre of our lives comes from the mood of our minds.

Matrix-y? Maybe.

But the truth is, the universe is indifferent. Whatever it is you’re seeing and experiencing, that’s not reality.

That’s your mood reflected back to you.

You know those fortune cookies? Your attitude determines your altitude, well… as lame as they are– it’s true.

You won’t do anything in life if you hate it.

Everything we have and everything we are will come from how we approach the world.

I was always ambitious, and yet for years nothing happened. Because deep down, I resisted my own life. I had a craving to retreat, to pull away, to disappear and be alone. That conflicted with my desires to achieve.

Inner conflict usually results in no movement.

I didn’t entirely resolve this either, but I started moving forward when I figured out how to fake it.

You don’t have to lie to the world, you just have to trick your mind.

You have to choose to be lighter, not take things so seriously, and free yourself up to new experiences.

We’re all writers, our lives are our scripts and we’re the main characters.

But we live as if someone wrote us a shitty script that we’re stuck with?

What can’t be edited?

Nothing.

If you don’t like where you are, how you’re living, or what you continually seem to struggle with– rewrite your script.

Life bends to our will.

That’s the secret.

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Full of free samples

Published September 22, 2021 by V

People don’t look the direction they walk, that’s why most won’t reach their goals.

Shiny object syndrome is a very real obstacle.

Imagine being bombarded by goo-roos and other “success” salesman 24/7. Naturally, It’s hard to stay in your lane…

I’d know.

You start to wonder: I don’t love my role as much as they seem to love theirs, maybe it’s time to expand into other fields. You see others succeeding from what looks like dabbling, they take on a little bit of this, that, and whatever other trends are hot right now….. and it works?!

Without cooking, they’re filling their belly with grocery store free samples.

But to really succeed, at least on any lasting level– you’ll need to learn to cook (build). You’re either the chef or the person selling the food– in fact, you’ll need one of these two skills: To know how to build or to sell (If you have both, well…. see you at the top).

If you have one and lack the other, you’ll likely have to partner up (still not a bad option).

For myself, I’m going it solo-dolo.

Mostly because I hate the idea of depending on someone or waiting to find someone… to then depend on.

The building background was my missing piece…. until now, I couldn’t build for shit. This is all new to me.

Hence this blog, my role, etc. Building is just working on something that you can sustain and develop over time.

Success comes from submission, and a lot of us won’t succeed because we “expand” onto other things before succeeding in our chosen pursuits.

Which is why I gave myself a simple rule to keep me focused: No looking at shit til you never have to work a job. No free samples.

I’m interested in so many things– NFTs look enticing, I’d still like to produce a creative project, I want to be involved in art, etc.

BUT none of these are options with a 9-to-5 or as a 9-to-5, at least not for me.

My top goal is being self-employed, so internet income from the skills I already have is how I’m going to get there. Only once I’ve secured this number 1 goal, then can I peak at the other lanes and possibly try them out.

AVOID THIS WEAK ASS ROOKIE MISTAKE: Expanding while incomplete.

That’s the difference between winners and losers, the ability to stick.

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