Month: November 2022

One of the harder and more bizarre things for my childhood self to accept was the concept of destiny.

I didn’t have hippy parents.

I wasn’t taught to believe those things.

But somehow I really believed, religiously.

I believed I was born for a very specific purpose– and that belief was in me for as long as I can remember.

That led to a counterintuitive approach…. I pretty much pissed away time by not experiencing life because it didn’t feel aligned with my purpose (which I still wasn’t sure what it was).

I did this for years– looking back, it’s still the most unimaginable thing to me.

It took anger and action to finally start achieving.

It took letting go of destiny, letting go of the idea that there is something specific, letting go of wanting to know– that’s when I finally started moving forward in my life.

I was angry I let myself be some bystander in my own life. When I acted, despite destiny, purpose, and whatever I thought my calling should be, only then did life start to get magical and I started to realize some of that magic.

My obsession was fulfillment, which translated to value.

How was my life going to contribute to this life?

If you’re in this place and looking to uncover your path I’ve got some advice:

First, forget planning it out. People stay stuck here because they’re planning for things they have no idea about– that never works.

Secondly, most the game will come down to attitude.

It actually starts here.

You have to maintain a spirit of excitement and embracing all challenges before you. YES, it’s hard AF to do this. I know.

But nihilists don’t have a purpose, they traded it to be the emo commentator of life (no slights intended, it coulda been me too).

The point is, you won’t find or create anything from the sidelines.

Before you can know or have an idea of what you’re meant to do– you have to step inside the arena.

Action first, then reflection, then adjust your course.

Move towards the things demanding your attention right now, see where forward leads you.

–FOOL

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Most of us treat our jobs like… jobs.

We show up, turn in what’s acceptable for the machine, leave, then do it again.

I used to think better to submit the crap work your boss wants– because firstly, that’s the standard the company is happy with, but also, now you can keep the genius projects for yourself and make something meaningful outside of work.

Truth is, if you don’t regularly practice genius, you won’t have any left for yourself.

People get stuck in life FOR THIS EXACT REASON.

They work jobs instead of Practicing Skill.

If we treated our role as if we were students, being graded each day, needing to graduate to the next year, we’d learn far more, become far more competent and valuable, and the biggest irony of all? We’d be way more fulfilled.

Just clocking in, leads to a life of clocking out.

If you want a good life, you don’t have to “save yourself” for success. It’s better you don’t since that rarely works.

You don’t have to know your next steps.

You just have to get better, but you can’t do that without an aim.

Pick something small, a goal, something that doesn’t depend on results but actions.

Rather than saying: I want a new job by X, try I’ll make a new resume this weekend. OR “I’ll submit this many apps” etc.

Focus on action and destiny will work itself out.

–FOOL

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I’ve never been hung up on “people.”

Luckily, out of all the problems I do have– my life bucket left out problems with them.

Occasionally, I do get pissed off and kinda dwell on the fact that some of my loved ones have become total idiots– the celebrity housewife kind. Which is sad to me, because they could have been smart.

But this isn’t about that— that doesn’t matter.

You can’t control others.

You can’t want things for them.

You don’t have a say in what people think and do… and shouldn’t want one.

All you can do is perfect your own action.

The sooner you accept and practice this, the lighter your life will be.

If you understand this, you will slide to the stop with grace while others fight and get stuck in the mud.

No one is talking to you.

No one is trying to insult you personally, even when they’re shouting in your face spitting inarticulate and incomplete thoughts and ideas that they’re hoping to find along the way but never do.

People are living in their own world.

Everyone is.

Know this, see how they see the world, borrow their vision in the moment– you don’t have to agree, in fact, better you don’t.

But see it.

And you’ll fly through life, convert haters to followers (without trying), and the only obstacle you’ll have left to conquer is the real one.

Let them get stuck, you’ll slide.

–FOOL

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Life is pretty much nothing like school– raising your hand and asking a stupid question doesn’t get ya points for mental attendance.

In fact, LIFE rewards behavior that got ya into parent teacher conferences and removed from fun Friday’s (not my trauma…).

In this way, success is counterintuitive because it demands bold action– and in your own name.

The things we used to be punished for, become the reasons we *could be* rewarded.

And this is something weird I’ve been noticing in my own life.

Despite how rude, dumb, inconsiderate, and childish I act– I’m climbing.

At first I was confused about it, why is it that I can say and do these things but others get in trouble for exhaling disappointment?

But it’s actually simple.

Besides being good at what I do (which you have to be before you can start having opinions) I’m going all out, and people know it.

EVERYONE wants someone who GOES ALL OUT.

None of us like a deadbeat part timer who half-asserys their entire life.

You want success? Stop treating it like a 9-5 or some school roll call. Find an environment that you feel aligns with what you want to be doing– and unleash your own potential.

Be a main character to live like one.

Your problem is you’re waiting to be discovered– maybe for the right opportunity to find and invite you to a more awesome life…. well, here’s the bad news for ya… no one invites the quiet kids. And it’s not because you’re an introvert, they genuinely didn’t notice you.

Want more than a bleak participation trophy and a part time existence?

You have to go all out.

That looks different for each of us, but a good way to start is by embracing the little things in your life.

Start small.

I hated all meetings at work, so I asked myself, “What would these look like if they were fun?”

I brought the fun.

Somehow meetings turned into opportunities which turned into slam dunk wins.

How would the person you want to be view your situation? PLAY AS THEM.

–FOOL

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I change my mind a lot.

I love something, then don’t.

I’m all in, then out.

I’m hot, then cold.

But there are things I can’t leave– and ironically, those are the things I’d like to.

This is what your path will look like.

It’s not how you imagine.

It’s not sheer joy, love, and ecstasy. Sometimes it could be, but most times it won’t be.

It’s just the thing you.can’t leave.

I’d like to focus on racking in more cash and just having fun, but can’t leave writing. Not even in my free time.

I have to stay the course because I’m now to the point where this, what I do, is who I am.

That’s how you’ll know whether or not you’re on your path. If you can’t leave it, stay.

If you can leave it, it was never the thing, so you should.

–FOOL

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If I could travel back in time and talk to dumbass me, I’d tell that idiot to stop looking for passion– because even if that concept is legit, it doesn’t apply to you.

“It aint that deep” would be the perfect title of my book.

I always thought my dreams and goals had to be something bigger than me, something I loved more than my own existence, something I could lose myself to.

As it turned out—- no.

Not even close.

In fact, the answer for me was very simple.

Work– in marketing as a writer, level up from there.

A piece of advice for you lost souls– if you “have” to find the right next step, you never will. Forcing action retards the mind and dulls the experience.

What you need is to fucking breathe, relax, and with a detached and objective mind, ask yourself where could I take my experiences next?

The work you can have fun doing is the answer.

Not the work you love more than yourself (might not even exist).

Not the work you feel called to do.

Not the work that doesn’t feel like work.

Just work on shit you can do, now, where you are.

Ta-da.

Life time mystery solved.

–FOOL

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You’ll never stop craving your vices, but when you have a solid plan– and a solid reason behind it, at least you won’t go off the rails and throw away that semi-functioning diet.

Thinking big is easy, working small is hard.

When you see time passing by and get that sinking feeling in your gut that everything is out of control and you have no idea what you’re doing with your life– it’s hard to lean into the present.

No one wants to think about today when they’re hoping for a better tomorrow.

But that’s the trap.

Thinking about and living in tomorrow is a guaranteed way to piss the present away (woah, poetic).

Point is, you need a plan.

You don’t need to know what you want to do, you need to know what you can do.

What’s acceptable for your life?

What makes a decent living?

Start there.

You need to make a choice, one that’s based on what you’re like not what you’d like.

What do you already know to do? Who could use this right now? Go there, and start.

–FOOL

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