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Tag: self motivation

Happiness Optimizers: Why More isn’t Better

You think to be happier, you need to get a new job, so you start chasing new jobs and make the leap.

And then realizing you’re not as happy as you could be, you think you’d be happier if you had a new place.

So you look for a new place.

Maybe you get the place, maybe you don’t. Now months pass, and you think to yourself you know what: I need a new hobby…a new passion, this, that, and the other thing.

People who know I run this treadmill tell me it’s great– it always pushes you to be better. I’d argue the opposite.

Self-improving is strangely miserable when taken to this extreme, because rather than serving a goal, we’re optimizing ourselves in useless ways.

We need to be inspired in life by something other than our own happiness– we have to be driven by something bigger than ourselves.

Not everything needs to be “upgraded”.

I used to chase self-improvement thinking it’d lead to some insane happiness, a better life, a tougher more disciplined me.

Instead, it made me stiff, stuck, and critical of others who weren’t on the same wave.

And the funny thing is– cold showers didn’t improve my life. Meditation didn’t make more successful. Intermittent fasting didn’t sculpt my abs.

All the best “improvements” came from small changes, not glorified self discipline.

Daily writing led to a career change, swapping weight lifting for muay thai put me in better shape, eating balanced meals got me shredded more than any weird trend diet.

Self-improvement shouldn’t be a hobby, if it is you’ll be miserable.

You only have so much energy, you should put that in key areas you care about and as for everything else, just live.

#StayFoolish

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Cheap Questions Poor Results…

“What do you want out of life?

Oh how this question used to haunt me. And if you answered happiness or magical awesomeness… refer back to the title.

Advertising has confused us.

A lot of the ideas we have about “the good life” and what would make us happy are wrong, and they’re not our own.

The best way I’ve ever heard this re-framed is by author Mark Manson, who offered an alternative to the traditional cheap questions.

“What pain do you want in your life? What are you willing to struggle for?”

 Everyone says they want success– either through freedom, entrepreneurship, or financial independence… the answer doesn’t really matter. Most people that say this aren’t willing to LIVE out the sacrifices that come from the building phase.

They don’t want the risk, stress, long nights and early days…. they don’t want the cost, only the reward.

You can’t win if you don’t play.

The problems you enjoy facing are the answer. It’s the bad experiences, the not planned outcomes, the days where you don’t know if you’ll make it– that determines a lot of what is for us.

I used to fantasize about being rich and famous. In this fantasy, I was basically a rockstar… for what? Nothing really, just successful. It sounds stupid, but I went after this for years- full steam ahead.

When this reality never came, because I only loved the end results and not the work itself- I left it cold.

Our struggles determine our successes, so choose wisely.

#FoolMeOnce

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