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Tag: habits

Sit on your hands

Published February 7, 2023 by V

Sometimes the best move to make, is no move at all.

We get restless, then we mess with shit.

Messing with shit is how you lose…

…sometimes you win too, but not mostly.

The unfortunate part behind this phenomena is the things we mess with are usually the things that are working fine and probably didn’t need to be touched.

The truth is, it’s not what you lack that’s holding you back— it’s something you have or do, a habit you haven’t kicked.

Take mine— boredom.

I prematurely jump ships, abandon islands, etc. all because I need to find something that doesn’t exist.

Whatever you’re looking for, ask yourself is it from a place of weakness or strength? Would you take this action if you were strong, successful, the person you wanted to be, etc.?

-Fool

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The New World Order: Guilt is for society, I play how I want

Published February 17, 2022 by V

You don’t have to love everything you do, I’ll concede to that.

But when it comes to your business– it should be toddler like when you reject the broccoli train forcefully invading your lips.

It’s going to be hard and the only way to sustain your efforts is to enjoy the process itself.

Which is why I don’t have guilt.

I try things out, don’t like them– then cut them out and never think about them ever again.

Others will shame you. Try to tell you it’s wrong, and stick longer, but why? Just because it takes you less time to figure out you don’t like it, doesn’t mean you might have fallen in love tomorrow had you stuck it out.

In reality, you’re at an advantage.

At least you won’t be stuck rat racing and tail chasing for 50 years to suddenly have a surprise crash followed by a fun identity crisis.

The game is a simple one and if we didn’t complicate ourselves and how important we think everything is, it’d be easy too.

We have to do things we don’t love, cool. I get that. So, take a job that at least covers some of your values– i.e. the company culture matches your personality. Now, it’ll be easier to have better days.

On the side, whatever you choose to build, that’s treated different.

YOU HAVE TO LOVE IT.

From exploring and taking on different clients, throughout my side hustling, I’ve learned so much about what I don’t want– and that informs what I do.

This is the key.

Try things, and move on fast when you realize you don’t like them.

With movement, you’ll land on your thing.

P.S. Oh, and remember nothing lasts and nothing matters. Find yourself stuck in a rut? Do something scary (I went skydiving) that you kinda want to do.

#FOOLFWD

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Happiness Optimizers: Why More isn’t Better

Published July 9, 2021 by V

You think to be happier, you need to get a new job, so you start chasing new jobs and make the leap.

And then realizing you’re not as happy as you could be, you think you’d be happier if you had a new place.

So you look for a new place.

Maybe you get the place, maybe you don’t. Now months pass, and you think to yourself you know what: I need a new hobby…a new passion, this, that, and the other thing.

People who know I run this treadmill tell me it’s great– it always pushes you to be better. I’d argue the opposite.

Self-improving is strangely miserable when taken to this extreme, because rather than serving a goal, we’re optimizing ourselves in useless ways.

We need to be inspired in life by something other than our own happiness– we have to be driven by something bigger than ourselves.

Not everything needs to be “upgraded”.

I used to chase self-improvement thinking it’d lead to some insane happiness, a better life, a tougher more disciplined me.

Instead, it made me stiff, stuck, and critical of others who weren’t on the same wave.

And the funny thing is– cold showers didn’t improve my life. Meditation didn’t make more successful. Intermittent fasting didn’t sculpt my abs.

All the best “improvements” came from small changes, not glorified self discipline.

Daily writing led to a career change, swapping weight lifting for muay thai put me in better shape, eating balanced meals got me shredded more than any weird trend diet.

Self-improvement shouldn’t be a hobby, if it is you’ll be miserable.

You only have so much energy, you should put that in key areas you care about and as for everything else, just live.

#StayFoolish

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Identity > Habits: Want lasting change? Then change.

Published July 7, 2021 by V

Sometimes it really is so much simpler than we can even imagine. You sit there, pissed off at the shittiness of life, try new habits and practices only to fail.

You imagine it must be you, and you’re right but for the wrong reason.

I didn’t invent this, and neither did the author who wrote the best selling book on it, but if you can understand and embrace this– your life will change immediately.

Identity is everything.

It’s ONLY this. This is the reason you move backwards or forwards, form good or bad habits, succeed or fail… identity is the gps for the human mind, and for your entire life.

You might think its corny, but that story you tell yourself plays out every single day. In fact, our stories become our lives.

If I say to myself, “I’m a writer” and I keep identifying with being a writer, I begin to act as a writer. What happens? I end up writing daily, practicing my craft, conducting myself as a writer.

Had I said, I need to write or I want to write– maybe I do, maybe I don’t.

If I say to myself, “I’m a fighter, I train and care for my body the way a fighter would, and never miss a muay thai class because fighters don’t.

I’ve always formed new habits easily, but until recently only realized why.

I make them apart of my identity immediately. You keep saying you need to get healthy, and like that you never will. You don’t need to “get healthy”, that’s temporary. You need to become a healthy person.

So make it your identity. “I am that type of person who takes care of their health.”

If you think this is hokey- mystical crap, I can assure you it’s science.

Something happens to us when we make things personal. We become our habits, when they become our identity.

Your brain likes to hold onto the shitty version of you because you’ve trained it to. Saying, “that isn’t for me, or that just isn’t me” is TOXIC.

If you want to level up, grow, and gain a better life– it needs to become you, you need to become more.

How?

Simple. What do you want out of life? I want to be an entrepreneur who runs a successful advertising business, podcast, and newsletter.

Okay, great. So who is this person and what do they believe and practice daily- to achieve this life?

They are a student of human nature, welcome all challenges and adversity because they love it, and always put themselves in discomfort.

I’m the type of person who’s always putting myself out there, attacking my fears, and learning.

Try it, the only thing you’ll lose is misery.

#FoolAround

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Mordor’s Open With The Habits

Published June 14, 2021 by V

Hey Fool.

Recently I gave up drinking a beloved energy drink, that I was pretty attached to. I’d drink it up to 3 times a day, and just one of them had 300mg of caffeine (I was doing this for over a year).

I’ve always been fairly caffeine intolerant, so I didn’t think much would change… but the timing of it all is the reason for this post.

What I failed to notice was my nervousness, my over-reactivity, being over-stimulated became my new normal.

When focusing inevitably became hard, I imagined it was from boredom– not my drink of choice.

So why did I quit and why does it matter?

I started a new habit.

Muay Thai.

After going for a week, this became my new love interest and this energy drink, and all my other bad habits (lack of sleep, waking up at insane hours, not focusing) were just getting in the way.

I quit cold turkey.

With this newer, better habit, consuming my life- other areas began to change. My sleep improved, I found myself more level headed and my focus returned.

Habits are destiny.

No magic, no spirituality, no none of that needed.

Changing tiny things, changes everything. There isn’t an area in your life this isn’t true. The difference between where you are and where you want to be is habits.

Figure out which ones you need, and start them.

It really is that simple.

#StayFoolish

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