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Tag: Finding your why

Side Characters Play Side Missions: Don’t Give Up On #1

Published November 23, 2021 by V

Your reading glasses are on your head… stop looking for them.

When you hear someone say they’re taking a break, leaving, starting anew, all of it with the goal of “finding themselves”, what the hell does that even mean?

A better question, how the phuck did you lose yourself?

What these soul-explorers are looking for is their values. Confidence, self-awareness, fulfillment, it comes through embodying the values you’re born to. And you were born to them.

Mistake #1 is you think you can just pick and choose.

You incarnated into this world as an already thing– a thing with a unique combination of natural inclinations and desires so why the hell would you cheat on that?

Let me make it easier, when you look to someone else and copy their path– you’re deciding to leave your mission and story to go be a background character in theirs.

You won’t be an actor if you don’t have any lines, and extras never do.

How does this happen anyway? Socialization baby. Growing up, they wash the individuality out of us because if we stand out, we die (figuratively, could be literally… depends on the country).

Once you DO make it out of the prerequisites of modern family, you have to return to who you are—- but damn it’s been a while. So comes the “finding yourself” age crisis.

This used to happen mid life, but if social media is good for anything- it’s revealing thoughts of a generation, and we’re losing ourselves younger these days.

So, do what you hate or do something for the wrong reasons– and be/stay a side character.

When you’re watching a movie, you don’t even notice the extras. They don’t have any lines, they exist just for context, to make the setting more believable. DON’T be an extra.

THIS IS YOUR MOVIE.

You’re free to play any way you want. I know, we all have responsibilities– but one of them is uncovering what you’re meant to do, and living that out. Actually this is TOP responsibility.

Here’s a challenge if you’re up for not sinking in sadness.

For the next 30 days (dated and in a notebook) write letters to yourself.

Every day, write down and answer:

  • what bothers me most?
  • what makes time go by faster?
  • whats fun?
  • what burns me out?

You can find yourself without going anywhere, in fact, theres no where to go. Uncover you, then play the movie as you were meant to.

—Fool Out

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Pic-Pocket Watch-Selling Entrepreneurs

Published June 17, 2021 by V

Hey Fool.

Last night I had dinner with a friend and we were talking about the entrepreneurial bug–nowadays, it seems like every millennial’s been bitten by it.

Being two, young and ultra ambitious individuals, we were both trying to get to the core of what made us stop pursuing delusion.

By nature, creatives are delusional.

Yeah, sometimes it serves them and makes for excellence… but have a look around, I’m not seeing anything other than mostly mediocre art.

Everyone wants their candy.

Who wants skills? Mastery? That isn’t fun, it isn’t very interesting, and it can be kinda lonely– since your entire social circle will mostly chase bullshit.

But unless you were actually the lemonade stand kid, played guitar and wrote poetry, lived for what you’re chasing, unless you were into these things for the sake of being into them– what you’re chasing is most likely NOT for you.

Most of the things I tried didn’t fulfill me. In fact, I hated them. Eating ramen and hustling 24/7? Fuck that.

I value health and activity.

Working on projects and ending the day with Muay Thai is more my speed. It’s not cool, but it’s fulfilling.

That’s the point.

Who sold you that cheap dream you’re chasing? Is it really something you want? Are you happy?

It’s funny, even now I’m occasionally struck by the pangs of entrepreneurial envy… wanting what the “greats” have.

But then I return to reality, I’m running my own race. I’m choosing skills, mastery, and building my life to be something more than just sacrifice.

While others depress themselves with delusion, you can find me patiently building.

Cheers,

–AnotherFool

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Cheap Questions Poor Results…

Published June 9, 2021 by V

“What do you want out of life?

Oh how this question used to haunt me. And if you answered happiness or magical awesomeness… refer back to the title.

Advertising has confused us.

A lot of the ideas we have about “the good life” and what would make us happy are wrong, and they’re not our own.

The best way I’ve ever heard this re-framed is by author Mark Manson, who offered an alternative to the traditional cheap questions.

“What pain do you want in your life? What are you willing to struggle for?”

 Everyone says they want success– either through freedom, entrepreneurship, or financial independence… the answer doesn’t really matter. Most people that say this aren’t willing to LIVE out the sacrifices that come from the building phase.

They don’t want the risk, stress, long nights and early days…. they don’t want the cost, only the reward.

You can’t win if you don’t play.

The problems you enjoy facing are the answer. It’s the bad experiences, the not planned outcomes, the days where you don’t know if you’ll make it– that determines a lot of what is for us.

I used to fantasize about being rich and famous. In this fantasy, I was basically a rockstar… for what? Nothing really, just successful. It sounds stupid, but I went after this for years- full steam ahead.

When this reality never came, because I only loved the end results and not the work itself- I left it cold.

Our struggles determine our successes, so choose wisely.

#FoolMeOnce

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The Disease of Passion

Published June 7, 2021 by V

Hey Fool.

I don’t know about you, but I’m done wasting life looking for something– that may or may not exist.

How did “PASSION” become the ultimate prescription to life?

Bored? Unhappy? Unengaged? Miserable?

That’s because you need to FIND your passion.

I’m not going to sit here and say that when it came to searching, there was no one more committed than me– but you should know, I breathed this advice to the fabric of my soul. I spent years doing absolutely nothing EXCEPT passion hunting. No friends, dating, not even side quests (hobbies)– only the mission. Only passion.

And guess what… that was a shit-ass life.

Needless to say, letting go was incredibly hard but liberating.

Look, it sounds awesome. A calling and purpose that when found- life instantly becomes your favorite movie.

The problem here? As you search, you neglect making the most of what you’ve got.

And each day you’re reminded you don’t have passion, is another day of you feeling angry and disappointed.

There have been studies proving this– even the individuals who started out passionate in their fields (the weirdos, who at 5 years old knew they wanted to be pro basket weavers), eventually returned to the regular earth rotation, where work isn’t always awesome-possum.

What these studies found is autonomy (having freedom to do your work) and competence (improving and progressing in skill) were the key determining factors to enjoying what you do.

That’s the answer to life, equivalent to the supercomputers 42.

Pick a valuable and economically relevant skill, and constantly develop it.

That’ll lead to a fulfilling life.

The whole- “finding your way” “Soul purpose” “Why I incarnated in this life” IS STUPID.

And it’s all a waste of life.

This is practical, proven, and immediate.

Try it.

Let’s do it together. For the next 3 months, only develop ONE skill relevant to this new economy.

#FoolMeOnce

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